The Birdman

A man and a woman in their second floor apartment. The woman is in the kitchen, making a sandwich. She lathers on the mayonnaise. The man stands at the window holding a newspaper and staring out at the houses across the street.

M: Who’s that there?
W: Where?
M: Over there? There’s a guy climbing a ladder.
W: Where?
M: At the Mikkelson’s place. On the garage.
W: I don’t… Oh. Oh I see.
M: Yeah.
W: He’s got a… some kind of a mask on.

The man climbing the ladder seems to have a big bird’s head on and some sort of heavy black feathery jacket on around his upper body.

W: Jesus.
M: What is he doing?
W: Does he have pants on?
M: I don’t know. Tights probably.
W: I think he has no pants!
M: No. He’s got tights, it’s some kind of costume.
W: No look. Look. He’s got no pants. You can see the…
M: Christ.
W: His…
M: Christ what is he doing?

The man reaches the rooftop and pulls himself up and kicks the ladder down with a kind of defiance and gusto. It falls into a tree on the other side, leaning up against the tree.

M: Look. Look at him there.
W: Step back. He might see us.
M: No. He can’t see us.
W: Step back.
M: I can’t see.
W: He’s looking over here.
M: Christ. You think he can see us?
W: Maybe.
M: With that mask?
W: I don’t know.
M: Christ.

The man walks to the apex of the roof of the garage and stands with both feet straddling either side. The garage door opens beneath him. A burnt orange Volkswagen pulls out into the driveway. The man leans over and looks down at the car, then stands and the mouth of the mask opens wide and there is a high pitched scream.

Sound: EEEEEEEEEEEE

M: Jesus!

Both the people watching cover their ears. The Volkswagen pulls out onto the street and continues to drive slowly past the house, not seeming to react at all to the sound or the man on the roof.

The two watchers let go of their ears as the screaming stops.

M: What was that?
W: He didn’t stop. You think he didn’t see?
M: How could you not see?
W: Down there. Maybe he’s out of sight.
M: How do you not hear THAT.
W: Maybe he heard but he didn’t see.
M: But that sound. What was that?
W: Call the cops.

The man searches for his cell phone, finding it on the table by a chair away from the window. He picks it up and unlocks it.

W: Wait.
M: What?

They watch as the bird headed man steps to the edge of the rooftop and peers right at them.

M: Good god.
W: He’s looking right at us!

The birdman’s big gleaming eyes stare straight at the couple. He leaps. The woman gasps. The birdman transforms and the couple watches as the a huge raven flies up and out of their view.

BOTH: Christ!